Nathalie Dion

Q: When I get really busy, I blank on names and sometimes forget important stuff. Is it just stress or am I losing my mind?

A: It’s a fact that stress inhibits the brain’s ability to learn new things and remember old ones, so your blanking is normal. You can fix that, though. Ever notice that when you try to remember something, you can’t, but if you “give up,” it pops back into your mind?

This is because the part of your brain that is trying hard to focus and get stuff done is also blocking access to all of your memories so you can concentrate. The best thing you can do is say, “Oh well, it’ll come back,” and relax.

On a more practical level, keeping track of everything in your head creates extra pressure that only makes things worse. So it’s a good idea to use a tracking system, whether it’s a day planner, BlackBerry, or Outlook reminder.

As for names, just say to the person you’re speaking with, “I’m so sorry, I’m not good with names. Can you tell me yours again?” Then repeat the name to yourself a few times, and picture the person’s face with the name. If you suddenly can’t recall the name of someone you know, just give a warm, “Hi! Great to see you.” Chances are she won’t even notice.

 
Related Links:

Istockphoto

Small changes in your routine can make you feel much more at peace. Try these strategies from Deepak Chopra, MD, author of the new book The Ultimate Happiness Prescription: 7 Keys to Joy and Enlightenment.

Tune in to your body
Whenever you feel any pain, fatigue, or anxiety, figure out what’s causing it. In order to be happy, you need to feel good physically, Dr. Chopra says. So if you’re exhausted, say, ask your husband to help so you can take a break.

Be Switzerland
“You can save 99% of your psychologicalenergy—and feel happier—if you can stop defending your point of view,” says Dr. Chopra. instead of always pushing your way of thinking and setting up a tense win-or-lose situation, say, “I see your point of view.” Listening toother sides will improve your relationships and make you feel calmer and sunnier, too.

Give yourself a pep talk
Try this instant confidence builder: Look in the mirror, and say out loud or to yourself, “I am immune to criticism, I am beneath no one, I am fearless.” It may make you giggle, but repeating this mantra helps people stand taller, according to Dr. Chopra.

Embrace the right now We know you’ve heard it before, but enjoying the moment rather than dwelling on future worries is a lasting mood-booster. If you start to drift, say to yourself, “Focus on the present.” That will help snap you back to the good stuff in front of you.

 
Related Links:

Laura Doss

These days it can feel like the age of anxiety is winning over the pursuit of happiness. An uncertain economy and the swine flu are just the tip of our worry iceberg. In fact, in a recent poll of Health readers, 48% of you say you worry more today than you did a year ago.

Here’s another anxious thought: Scientists say women are wired to worry—at least more so than men. In our poll, 54% of you said you worry more than your spouse, with only 12% claiming your partner worries more than you do.

That’s thanks, in part, to the hormonal roller-coaster women ride month to month and through the years. “The highs and lows can make women prone to feeling everything from anxious to depressed,” says Jerilyn Ross, a licensed independent clinical social worker, president and CEO of the Anxiety Disorders Association of America, and author of One Less Thing to Worry About.

And while men tend to be linear problem solvers, “Women are more in touch with their emotions, and worry is an emotion,” points out Judith Orloff, MD, a psychiatrist and author of Emotional Freedom: Liberate Your-self from Negative Emotions and Transform Your Life.

Still, experts say that with some practice we all can learn to be a little less worried and a whole lot happier. Here’s your recipe for a more joyful life. Read on and say, “So long, dark side.”

Next: Find your joy

(Getty Images)

Amid the highest unemployment rate in recent decades and massive job losses around the country, most workers feel happy to at least be employed. What they aren’t feeling, however, is healthy.

One in three workers has at least one symptom of clinical depression; 41% say they feel stressed sometimes, often, or very often; and one in five has trouble falling asleep often or very often. In all, 14% are being treated for high cholesterol and one in five is taking blood-pressure-lowering medication.

In fact, the percentage of workers who say they’re in excellent health has dropped from 34% in 2002 to 28% in 2008, according to a report recently released by the Families and Work Institute (FWI), a nonprofit research company.

“When we try to explain what happened [since 2002], it wasn’t what we thought was the simple answer—that the population is getting older and younger people simply have better health,” says Ellen Galinsky, the FWI’s president and cofounder. “It was a change among men and higher income employees [due to] the uncertainty around the economy and the greater pressure that people are feeling to manage their work and family life.”

Some workplaces are healthier than others
Not all workplaces are created equal when it comes to health. In fact, 38% of workers at certain jobs—called “effective” workplaces in the report—were much more likely to say they were in excellent health. Conversely, only 19% of employees in workplaces with a low effectiveness rating reported being in excellent health.

So what makes an effective workplace? Six factors make a difference, Galinsky says. Workers may feel healthier if they have “learning opportunities and challenge, a good fit between work and personal life, autonomy, having a supervisor who supports job success, economic security—no surprise in this economy—and a work climate of respect and trust,” she says.

Eric Endlich, PhD, a Massachusetts-based clinical psychologist who specializes in workplace health, says these factors can make people feel in control of their destiny, challenged but not stressed, and appreciated.

“If someone is stressed at work from [feeling like they lack in] any of these factors, they could have a higher pulse, hypertension, [and] higher blood pressure, and if these things happen chronically they can worsen as well as worsen an existing condition,” he says.

Feeling a lack of control in the workplace or not enough support from a supervisor may lead to feelings of helplessness, says Endlich, which in turn can spiral into depression, “which is associated with lots of poor health outcomes [and] increases mortality rates from all causes,” he says.

According to the report, one of the biggest predictors of feeling healthy is a balance between work and personal life. “If someone has difficulty with this balance,” says Endlich, “then they’re going to be cutting back wherever they can,” including on important components of a healthy lifestyle, like getting enough sleep, shopping for and preparing healthy food, and exercising.

Next page: What employers—and employees—can do

Marc Royce

It was one of the best—most awesome—weeks of my career: Within 36 hours of my latest novel hitting the best-seller list, I signed with a publisher for my novel-in-progress plus a second book. I was beyond ecstatic that all my hard work had paid off.

My husband was the first to know. Then I called my parents. After Mom and Dad, I … well … I wasn’t sure who to tell next. I just couldn’t bring myself to pop the proverbial cork on the news. Instead, I let my husband and my parents do the telling for me. And once the word leaked out, I still insisted on downplaying it with a humble preface (“It barely made the list”) and epilogue (“It’ll probably never happen again”).

To their credit, my best friends wouldn’t take the self-deprecating bait. “Stop being so modest!” shouted my friend Rachel. “You! Are! Awesome!” But it’s not just me. Lately, I’ve noticed a general reluctance to share good fortune—of any kind. One friend completed her first half-marathon but swears she nearly died at the finish line. A family member reached her goal weight but warned she’s just one cupcake away from exploding out of her skinny jeans. A colleague thanked me for praising her book, then called it the biggest piece of crap not only in the history of crap but in the history of history.

Why are we so tight-lipped about our good fortune? I polled my friends, and two themes emerged, both tied to the fact that we’re being bombarded with media stories about lost jobs, homes, savings. First, to talk up our happy news in the face of others’ adversity just seems insensitive.

And my friend Carolyn accidentally reminded me of the second reason we keep mum: “I’m thrilled for you when you do well,” she said. “Of course, if I didn’t like you, I might put the voodoo on you.” She was kidding—I hope. But her joke brought up our very real fear of being jinxed. That all the good stuff could vanish. Just. Like. That.

Fortunately, there’s no evidence that such hexes actually work. On the other hand, researchers at Harvard Medical School and the University of California, San Diego, have observed that happiness spreads virally throughout a social network. In other words, hearing about positive occurrences—whether they’re achieved through hard work or good luck—can boost morale for my friends, my friends’ friends, and their friends’ friends’ friends, too. So, while it’s important to open up to pals about your challenges, you can have a much bigger impact by sharing your bliss.

That makes total sense to me. When something great happens to one of my friends, it makes me happy, too. Of course, I have to know about it first. So don’t hold back! Work that joyous mojo. Just imagine what would happen if we all made an effort to celebrate, not self-deprecate. The collective power of positivity could trigger an epidemic of awesome.

 
Related Links:

Ericka McConnell

Nothing against the other seasons, but summer is the one that inspires us to be our very best. Temps rise and suddenly all of our good intentions go from being things we intend to do to things we actually do.

Routines are simplified, layers are shed, and fun and healthy decide to hold hands. That’s why we’ve pulled together these 14 little moves to get you off to a good start this summer, when the living is easier—and lighter. Enjoy!

Line dry your clothes
Nothing brings back the lazy days of summer like clothes drying in the warm wind. Instead of giving your wardrobe a manufactured fresh-air scent, you’ll be giving them the real thing. To keep wrinkles at bay, give your clothes a good snap before hanging them on the line; finger smooth each item while hanging.

And did we mention that line drying lightens the environmental load, too? Drying just two loads of laundry on a clothesline every week instead of using an electric dryer saves energy equal to the amount needed to run your fridge for four months, says Elizabeth Rogers, author of The Green Book: The Everyday Guide to Saving the Planet One Simple Step at a Time and founder of ShiftYourHabit.com.

Add some sunny yellow
“Yellow is happy, optimistic, clean, upbeat,” says Leslie Harrington, PhD, executive director of The Color Association. But, like that perpetually cheerful co-worker, yellow can be exhausting, so go easy. Try a vase of daisies in the entryway to see how you respond to the shade before you make a more permanent commitment. Another option: Paint just one wall bright yellow; we like Benjamin Moore’s St. Elmo’s Fire (a zesty citron yellow) and Sundance (a paler hue).

Next: Give your Spanx the summer off

Istockphoto

Diane is a blind-from-birth woman who’s had her share of tough times. Her husband, who’d been supporting her, died suddenly. She then got a job for the first time in her life, only to be laid off when the economy took its nosedive. What advice do I have for her and all of us going through difficulties right now? Well, resiliency experts Suzanne Kobasa and Salvatore Maddi have found that those who thrive best in adversity all believe in the three C’s:

Challenge: They see change as a chance to grow.

Control: They believe they can change their lives for the better and act on it. Rather than focusing on what’s outside their control, they concentrate on things they can influence.

Commitment: They’re passionate about their pursuits and see life as having meaning and purpose.

Developing bounce-back qualities with the three C’s can give you an enormous advantage right now. Research shows that resilient folks are more likely to be kept on staff during downsizing, more likely to get hired, more likely to learn new skills when their job is eliminated, better able to help their families and communities through hard times, and less likely to get ill under stress. Sign me up!

I asked Diane about the three C’s when she came to see me. She’d been living on her own in the house she’d owned with her husband, despite her parents begging her to move in with them, so she had the challenge part down. As for control, without a job Diane, nevertheless, thought of a way to support herself. “I live in a big house near a university,” she said. “I could rent rooms to graduate students.” And when I asked about her passions, she revealed that she cared deeply about helping young people with disabilities use new technologies. She’s now looking for work in that field. Despite her difficult circumstances, Diane’s using the tools of resilience to move forward.

The three C’s can help you find balance in difficult times. Here, some questions to make sure you’ve got them by your side.

Consider the challenge. “How could what I’m going through be a growth opportunity?” If you don’t have an immediate answer, work toward it by focusing on the small stuff first. If, say, you lost your job, think about how you finally have more time to see friends.

Take control. “What can I control? What can I do to feel more in control?” Remember Diane—she took in boarders while looking for work.

Make a commitment. “What gives me meaning and purpose, and how can I get involved?” If you love animals, volunteer at an animal-rescue center. When you get in touch with what you truly care about, you feel better about yourself and live a happier life—no matter what else is going on around you.

 
M. J. Ryan is a life coach and the author of many self-help books, including This Year I Will … .

 
Related Links:

Istockphoto

Feeling stuck in a rut? A few simple changes in your daily routine can sharpen your mind and improve your attitude. Here’s how to get started:

Switch hands
Use your nondominant hand to do daily tasks like brushing your teeth or clicking the computer mouse. This simple change promotes the growth of neurons in the brain, which can sharpen memory and thinking. “It’ll give your brain the regular workout it needs to stay healthy,” says life coach and Health columnist M. J. Ryan, author of AdaptAbility: How to Survive Change You Didn’t Ask For (in bookstores in May).

Engage your senses
Get dressed with your eyes closed. One night at dinner, communicate only nonverbally (that’s right, no words). By relying on different senses, you create more neurons in your brain and get more creative.

Try something fresh
It doesn’t have to be anything big—a free class at a dance center, a new recipe. You begin to think, I can do this! And that can lead to even greater accomplishments. When you learn a new skill, your brain actually builds new circuitry. “Think of it as mental cross-training,” Ryan says.

Ask: What’s right about this?
“How you frame something can change everything,” Ryan says. Try to consider the sunny side of a situation rather than focusing on what’s wrong with it. So if it’s pouring rain, instead of stressing about getting drenched, think of the good it will do for your garden. The result: A more optimistic and inventive you who can take on just about anything.

 
Related Links:

Mixing up your routine in these simple ways can do wonders for your brain, mood, and future.

Switch hands
Use your nondominant hand to do daily tasks like brushing your teeth or clicking the computer mouse. This simple change promotes the growth of neurons in the brain, which can sharpen memory and thinking.

“It’ll give your brain the regular workout it needs to stay healthy,” says life coach and Health columnist M. J. Ryan, author of AdaptAbility: How to Survive Change You Didn’t Ask For (in bookstores in May).

Engage your senses
Get dressed with your eyes closed. One night at dinner, communicate only nonverbally (that’s right, no
words). By relying on different senses, you create more neurons in your brain and get more creative.

Try something fresh
It doesn’t have to be anything big—a free class at a dance center, a new recipe. You begin to think, I can do this! And that can lead to even greater accomplishments. When you learn a new skill, your brain actually builds new circuitry.

“Think of it as mental cross-training,” Ryan says.

Ask: What’s right about this?
“How you frame something can change everything,” Ryan says. Try to consider the sunny side of a situation rather than focusing on what’s wrong with it. So if it’s pouring rain, instead of stressing about getting drenched, think
of the good it will do for your garden.

The result: A more optimistic and inventive you who can take on just about anything.

Related links: